BEAUTY AND THE BEAST: A HORNY LOVE STORY - AN OUTRAGEOUS 4* REVIEW

At the weekend, I had the pleasure of being invited along to see the ‘He’s Behind You!’ production of Beauty and the Beast: a Horny Love Story playing at the Charing Cross Theatre. A big thank you to Georgina and the team for the invite.

Beauty and the Beast: a Horny Love Story is a new, and crude, take on the classic tale which you may think you know… but think again! Set in the Scottish town of ‘Lickmaknockers’ — one I seemingly missed whilst travelling the NC500 this past summer — we are introduced to Bonnie and Bertie, children of Flora, who runs a petrol station and convenience store. Then we hear of a 25-year-old curse that has turned a prince into a beast — but when Bertie meets the Beast of a man, what will he think? I’ll let you see it to find out!

The script of this pantomime (which is strictly for adults 18+) was written by Jon Bradfield and Martin Hooper. With so much romance taking place within the story — in fact, I’d say it was the main theme — this was a very positive and LGBTQ+ supportive show, with both children of the dame looking for same-sex relationships. There are many a joke throughout the show on this, but not in a mocking way of course — always celebratory! I found there were also many outrageous sexual jokes thrown into the script (as expected with an adult pantomime). My only issue when it came to this was that some of the jokes had a ‘samey’ feel to them, and a couple dragged on maybe a little longer than necessary. That being said, the script still was engaging, packed with story and a good laugh too!

The cast was led mainly by Matthew Baldwin as the dame ‘Flora’, who characterised beautifully. This was one of a few performances that was totally eye-catching. Every comedy line landed, with some hilarious ad-libs added on too. Baldwin has mastered the art of pantomime, which is supported by the fact that the audience were totally onside from the first scene. Chris Lane plays a camp and cruel villain, ‘Cornelius’, the brother of our princely Beast, only set out to stop the curse from being reversed. His various disguises show off Lane’s range as a performer and proved for a good giggle upon every entrance.

Playing our ingenue ‘Bertie’ was Matt Kenedy, who commanded the stage pretty well with some powerful vocals, comedic delivery, and overall presence. As the Beast, we see Keanu Adolphus Johnson, who had a fabulous booming voice and created a Beast that was hard not to love — and Bertie certainly did love him… I’ll leave that there. 

The role of Bonnie was performed by Laura Anna-Mead, who I thought brought a whole new energy to the show. I just wish they could have featured the character of Bonnie a little more. Anna-Mead’s performance was a breath of fresh air within the show! And finally, Juno, the enchantress, was played by Dani Mirels giving a fun and engaging performance!

Completing the cast, and for me really putting a bow on top of this show, was the ensemble — Olivia Grace-Weaver, Ben Mabberley, and Owen Arkrow — who all played cameo roles throughout the show and, a lot of the time, got the biggest laughs with their side-splitting one-liners! Their energy throughout, including the dance numbers, carried this show to another level.

The music within the pantomime is all pastiche works of classic tracks that you may recognise, composed by Bradfield. I thought that whilst what was being performed onstage was wonderful, and the choreography and execution of such was so high-energy and slick, I think what this adult panto was missing was songs that you would recognise. I felt that the room fell a little flat when they did not know the song, but if anthems such as It’s Raining Men and Like a Prayer were used, for example, it could have really elevated the material, in my opinion. That being said, this is no insult to Bradfield, who has composed some fantastic songs for the piece, or the cast, who nailed the performance of them. It is simply an acknowledgement of my thoughts on the way these numbers sat within the performance.

Other than some slight slow pacing within Act 1, I think that this is a great adult pantomime — if you’re someone who finds sexual humour amusing; luckily, I did! If you are looking for a fun night out in London, close to Charing Cross station in a lovely intimate venue, then check out He’s Behind You’s Beauty and the Beast: a Horny Love Story, which is running at the Charing Cross Theatre until January. It’s packed with dirty comedy, sexual references, and a light dusting of the bare derriere. If this sounds like your cup of tea, grab some tickets from here — and visit their website for more information.

Thank you again for the invite, I had a great time.

PR/INVITE

15th December 2025

Robbie Davies | Robbie’s Backstage Bants